Day 14 // Short Film about Depression (TRIGGER WARNING: psychotic, drug use, adult themes)

Instagram: @gracechiaphotog

A film that I made for my media specialization. Probably one of my most personal trips through the making of movies while trying to show what it really was like to live with depression. This project took 5 months and I hope everyone can take something from him xx

Music: Cinematographic Orchestra: to build a house

Video credits to Grace Chia YouTube channel

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    Day 14 // Short Film about Depression (TRIGGER WARNING: psychotic, drug use, adult themes)

    Comments 26

    1. Hey all! I am Trina, founder and facilitator at My Heart On Me- a free avenue for you to engage in deeper relationship and continuous breakthrough. As one who has had her first lapse in to depression at 11 years old, MHOM was birthed from a place of depression and anxiety.

      Feel free at anytime to reach out to me at Xx

    2. Worst thing is losing the one person you love because they don’t understand your overwhelming feelings of brokenness

    3. Being a girl with depression and anxiety this literally relates to me… I miss those times being happy like hell and being able to live freely… now I can't resist myself from crying a single day for no reason at all… I feel like dying everyday… I can't see the happiness and hope even though it's in front of me on my way… every morning now feels like a horrible struggle to go out and face those people out there… I miss the old me

    4. Reconnect to god and bring loads of light in ur life. Guaranteee..pray to ur god life under the law of god u'll be happy in every sec.

    5. when you want help but dont want to be treated like your insane.
      when you want everyone to make you happy again but want to be alone.
      you want to dress up but you dont have the willpower
      you want to run and play outside with friends but you dont have the energy
      you want to make friends but they run because they see the scars….

      ….your mind is torn….you dont know what you want, what to do. why is this happening to you? why cant i do these things?! why do i feel the urge to cut myself for no reason? why do i want to die because of cutting? why am i not normal? why am i not like other girls? why am i so diffrent? why am i not smart? why am i so ugly? why do i feel jealousy? why do i like my bestfriend? why do i like the same sex? why does no one care? why am i not enough? ….

      im never enough for anyone?
      my mom is dissapointed that im such a slob, one cut for that
      my dad is dissapointed that i cant do it right, another for that
      my grandma, hates my grades, one more…
      my grandpa wants me to be good at basketball and im not, another
      my aunt she just plain out hates me…another
      my best friend talks about me behind my back…one more
      my friend said i was stupid 23 times….23 cuts for that
      the boy who said i was to ugly to be a model, another….
      do you think thats enough cuts for today?
      your stupid, you made yourself even uglier if possible! you cant even commit to killing yourself! might as well as let the blood stain your clothes! not you have to deal with wearing jeans and long sleves tomorrow! better hope its cold! your so stupid!!! might as well as cut deeper not like anyone will notice!….
      now you clean up the mess you made….you bandage yourself up….

      few years later your fine until your friend starts dating your crush….fighting the urge for a few months…..then it gets worse….they start kissing infront of you….they ditch you….you cut once. …felt good but you force yourself to stop…they kiss and your friend hugs your crushes arm and that send you over the edge….you hold it in for one more day and take it out you grab your razor and stare at it then push against your delegate skin….you carve a broken heart in your skin….you go to youtube and watch depressing videos not want to go to school anymore….and you finally pour your soul out hoping someone reads and offers help….but doubt it….

    6. I have absolutely none I can speak to on this topic. So, I wanna tell my story here. I fell in “love” with a man in July. He’s around 50, he’s married and I know u can blame me for this, I know it’s wrong. At least I thought I loved him. In August me and my family went on vacation and I was listening to all these songs about love and older men, I was imagining being with him, even though I knew it could only be an affair, nothing more. But I was happy. I’ve never been so happy in my entire life. I saw him again in September and I was seeing him 2 times a week for 2 weeks. I was ready to go in for it. But I accidentally heard his wife saying they would have a holiday and come back in November only. I got a bit sad, but I thought I could handle that. And I almost did. But with weeks going by I was becoming more and more sad, and for this month and a half I found myself crying almost every night, as well as in the summer. So, November came, but he didn’t show up. And I began crying even oftener. I met him on the first of December, but convinced myself, that I don’t need him & gonna live for myself and fake it till I could make it. But I didn’t have enough strength. I’m broken right now. And I don’t get why? I don’t love him, it’s something like a habit. And I don’t have enough power to quit it, to give it up. And it’s probably for not being able to see any sense of life except for him. I thought I was happy, but I was burying myself alive, cause I love sadness and it’s like a drug. I don’t know what to do next and who I am. I don’t like doing anything, I don’t feel like doing anything, nevertheless I go to school and laugh and make jokes all the days with my classmates, but when I come home I’m being broke. Help me find sense in life, please

    7. I saw myself today in this vid its so hard i wanna run just run from all this i wanna my life back damn i dont have words crap

    8. The only thing I felt was missing was the lack of attention to hygiene/appearance. Usually when people are stuck in it (including myself) it's too exhausting to bathe regularly and care for yourself like you normally would. Resorting to just dry shampoo for 2 or 3 days and just wiping your face off with wet washcloth at night. The showering process is too draining. Throwing hair up in a bun or pony tail, no time to style or care for it. And definitely no make up lmao. Then add some more deodorant. That's about it. Get up the next day, push through your outside obligations. Go back home, and repeat. The clothes she wore were accurate though, and the isolation was spot on. As well as the night time drinking. The experience is subjective I guess, after all~

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